Double Shot
by Smile
Summary: James Bond is called off his long-awaited vacation by M, who has an emergency at hand...
1. Relaxation takes its leave

James Bond, agent 007 in the British Secret Service, was tanning,  
  
on the beach at the Sol de Oro resort, in Southern Spain. He enjoyed the   
  
quiet, and he thought happily that for once he was sitting on a beach to  
  
relax, not scope out some multi-millionaire suspected of fraud or murder  
  
of a colleague. His sunglasses were purely for UV protection, the rental   
  
car he had driven did not provide a smoke-screen or bullet-proof windows,   
  
and his cell phone didn't shoot darts. He was here from a break...  
  
M had told him, before he'd left, that if he even brought a gun  
  
with him, she would use it to shoot him when he least expected it.  
  
"You need the rest. You work like a dog!" she'd told him.  
  
So, Mr. Bond was sitting in the sun, without a worry on his mind  
  
on the 6th of July. Well, without a worry until his cell phone rang.  
  
"Hello, there. Mr. Bond speaking."  
  
"Hello, James. It's Money Penny. Sorry to disturb you like this  
  
on your vacation, but M says you must come back to headquarters immediately."  
  
"IMMEDIATELY? But I'm supposed to be relaxing! This is absurd!"  
  
"Don't worry James. I'm sure whatever beautiful, foreign girl you're   
  
romancing at the moment can wait for her charming Englishmen. Good bye."  
  
There was, for once, in fact, no girl at all. This was very odd  
  
for James, but he had decided to devote most of his time to sitting on  
  
the beach this trip. Usually girls he got involoved with ended up being  
  
the former fiances of late Russian agents whom he had killed, and were  
  
trying their hand at revenge. This usually led to him having to save the  
  
girl from crocodiles, sharks, or men with guns, for some reason which  
  
is unknown. Anyways, James had decided against a girl this trip.  
  
And now he was going back to London. Well, he supposed he had to  
  
go. If M had called him back after so thouroughly insisting absolute  
  
relaxation, it was something serious.  
  
And so Mr. James Bond went to arrange air line tickets. 


	2. The assignment

"Hello James," Money Penny greeted Mr. Bond with the same cheerful respect, despite the early hour of 5 in the morning.  
  
"Send him in, Money Penny," M's voice came over the intercom.  
  
"There was no girl," he mumbled groggily as he stumbled into M's office. Penny didn't look as though she believed him.  
  
"Agent 007. You've arrived," M, a woman in her late fifties with a fair amount of wrinkles to start with, seemed to have lines cut deeper in her face today. Something must really be serious, thought James.  
  
"Hello, Mr. Bond," Q stood in the corner, looking very tired.  
  
"Hello, M, Q. What's happened that you sent for me?"  
  
M pressed a button on her desk and a screen surfaced out of the wood panelling. A map of Australia and the Southwestern Pacific appeared on the screen.  
  
"It's Anrey, the Prime Minister of Australia. He was assassinated yesterday afternoon. He was shot in the chest, twice."  
  
"But surely the Australian Secret Service can take care of this. Was he in a public place?"  
  
"That's just the thing. He was found in his own bedroom, with all the windows locked."  
  
"Not the doors?"  
  
"No, they were all open."  
  
"So surely you can find out just who had entered the house? And who heard something?"  
  
"Of course we can. But that's not all. Yesterday evening, around four hours after Anrey's death, Woodmoor, the Prime Minister of New Zealand, was also assassinated."  
  
James sat down heavily in the chair across from M's desk.  
  
"And it's believed that the two murders are connected?"  
  
"Can you see it as being a coincidence?"  
  
"No, I suppose not."  
  
M pressed another button on her desk. On the map on the wall, a red dot appeared labelled "Canberra".  
  
"You fly to the capital of Australia in the morning. Now if you follow Q he'll show you your equipment for this mission. Oh, and there's one more thing 007."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Both Anrey and Woodmoor were found with a bullet in their chest AND in their back. They were shot from both sides. Watch your back, Mr. Bond." 


	3. The gadgets

Ya, I know that there's no longer an "R", but I LOVE the old "Q", and he died, so now "R" is "Q" and is played by John Kleese, but I don't care: I'm using the old one. (SO THERE'S AN "R")  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"You look tired Q, something keeping you up?" James inquired of Q as they walked down the hall.  
  
"Yes, actually, I was up all last night putting the finishing touches on your car, so that you don't go and die on us." James reigned him self to silence.  
  
Poof! (ya I know that sounded gay) A cloud of smoke exploded as James followed Q into the laboratory.   
  
"R! What's going on?" Q looked annoyed as he stared at his gadget-creator-in-training.  
  
"I was just working on our new smoke screen, sir."  
  
"You're sure that's not something else burning?"  
  
"Positive, sir. There's supposed to be smoke this time."  
  
"Thank god." Q added under his breath to James, "That man could set an ocean on fire." He continued, loud again,"If you follow me right this way, Mr. Bond, I'll show you what we've got in store for you this time."  
  
James looked around at the people milling around, making various loud noises and injuring various dummies. Q led him to a beautiful red Corvette.  
  
"She's a beauty Q!"   
  
"She oughta be. Packed with your standard smoke screen, oil slick, bullet proof glass, remote control steering, a sun roof, and, of course, cup holders."  
  
"Sound nice."  
  
"That's not all. She's got a global positioning system, a built-in weather forecastor, sirens, an extra cache of cartridges under the driver's seat, and something called a projector seat."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"I'll show you. R, come over here!" he called. "R, I'd like to do a demonstration for Mr. Bond. Could you get in the passenger seat?"  
  
"Yessir."  
  
R got in the car, and Q took a remote control out of his pocket and pressed a button. Simeutaneously, the sun roof opened and R's chair projected out of the car. As he fell back down, a parachute came out of the back of the seat, and he settled gently on the ground.  
  
"That may come in handy," said James.  
  
"Now right this way is your tanning lotion Mr. Bond."  
  
"I take it that this isn't really tanning lotion," said James as Q handed him a bottle.  
  
"No, not at all. It's cyntobicarbonite of alectisyll, a deadly acid."  
  
"Sounds lovely."  
  
"Just don't forget what it really is, Mr. Bond. Oh, and here is your beach umbrella. Equipped with blow darts." Q demonstrated at the wall. "Just don't forget which end is which."  
  
"Thank you, Q. I'm sure this will all be a big help."  
  
"Don't mention it, Mr. Bond. But I want all of my equipment back, so please, BE CAREFUL!" 


End file.
